Hello again everybody. Hope you have all had lots of lovely walks, treats and excitement since our last edition.
Chaos and I are having a great time at the moment. Our Mum, who in our opinion is as perfect as they come, has gone on something that her and her friends talk about all the time and it’s called a diet.
I have to say that we don’t like it at all from a food point of view, we aren’t getting any nice sweetie treats, no ice cream, no chocolate (don’t tell anybody she gives us just a little nibble of chocolate because apparently she’s not supposed to), no biscuits, no cake, no nothing. She keeps putting these disgusting things called vegetables in our food – we chuck it on the floor as there is no chance we’re eating that, we’d rather (and do), chew on a bit of old wood.
On the other hand however we are getting lots of walks – morning, noon and night, and really really long walks as well, so no complaints in that direction, we are walking over fields and dales, up hills and down hills, it is fantastic. In fact I’m sure my legs, which are normally about four inches long have worn down to three inches!!!
Chaos is now almost fully grown and still getting into trouble. She insists on climbing trees which I grew out of much earlier in life. I wouldn’t mind if she was ever able to convince one of the squirrels to come out of the tree so we could eat it but she’s fairly useless at that.
She also keeps charging about after pigeons and other birds, barking like a mad thing at them as though expecting them to come down and play – she has got such a lot to learn.
I had a bit of a trauma a couple of weeks ago. I was set upon by a border collie and it bit through my ear and when we got home my head and ear were all bloody. However my Mum bathed it in salt water for a couple of days. I got tons and tons of sympathy and hugs and I didn’t even have to move off my Mum’s side of the bed the first night… I’d given her my best pathetic, I’m injured look – you know the one – and I got to stay put, mind you it did only last one night.
Chaos snuggled up close as well so I was very well looked after during this terrible time and of course I milked it for all it was worth – well wouldn’t you?
We will give you another update in the next column which will hopefully be a little more exciting now our Mum is fully able to take us out and about.
Take care, enjoy your walks
Don’t forget to email me on firstname.lastname@example.org if your human will let you use the computer.